MILNET Opinion
 Hillary Dillary,  12/30/2004
"We're saying that for America to get back on track, we're probably going to cut that short [tax cuts-MILNET] and not give it to you. We're going to take things away from you on behalf of the common good."
- Hillary Rodham Clinton, San Francisco, California Fundraiser, 7/6/2004 11

Hillary dillary dock, the Senator ran out the clock.  With little time to dither, she's got the Republicans in a lather, the next Demo to blather.  Poor symmetry in that limerick, we do apologize.  The fact remains, however, that only a few fools remain in the world who aren't looking to see Hillary Clinton make a run for U.S. President in 2008.  Even Alan Simpson is convinced.  That is saying something -- Alan's cynicism obviously does not extend to ruling out the Junior New York Senator's run at her husband's former office.

What is so important is that it closes the loop on some interesting questions...again Alan has made it clear that he believes Kerry was a "throwaway candidate".  We couldn't agree more. 

What is scary however, is the prospects of another Clinton in the White House.  As our Chief Editor was growing up, the oft used term "Poor White Trash" was used to describe the denizens who, in a $200 aluminum sided five foot square "mobile home" would plant that eyesore in the front yard and proceed to plant anything that didn't fit inside right out front so that everyone in the neighborhood would have to look at it for the next decade.

The poor white trash could be counted on to steal silverware from the banquet at Howard Johnson's and always tended to wear clothes that were, while perhaps washed, stained with excesses at the banquet tables of the past.  Poor Johnny, the helpless child of the poor white trash parents, was picked on by his peers, perhaps for no other reason that those very same examples of uncouth and careless upbringing.  The fact that a lot of poor white trash may have started out in states like Arkansas, Texas or South Carolina also might have something to do with this awful stereotype.

The problem, of course, is that in the course of history, we've sadly seen the stereotype supported by the actions of some not so poor white trash and that stereotype has oft extended to the highest office of the land.

Of course our careful readers have made the connections in our poorly disguised approach to the question of the day. What would a second Clinton White House do to the nation and the highest office in the land?

Well for one thing, the National Parks folks, who have some say as to what can go in or leave the white house, should take a careful inventory of the chandeliers, silverware, and portraits.  After all there was that little dispute of items "gone-a-missin'" the last time a Clinton was in the White House.

Then there is that issue of uncertain sexual conduct.  Now clearly Hillary is more the victim in that previous affair, but who is to say that revenge is not out of the question?  That does get one thinking.  And of course what about poor Chelsie.  We hear she is looking at matrimony.  Poor fellow is likely to get branded just like poor Johnny in our previous foray into stereotypes.  We have no envy for the daughter of the Clintons, life for that one has to be pretty rough.  Course the cash the former President has been able to sock away for his daughter, probably with an angry Hillary standing at his shoulder, is going to help her get over the stigma of being the daughter of the most sexually active and repugnantly so President in history.

Of course, having now thrown a rather large bucket load of excrement at the Clinton's direction, we thought it more responsible to take a look at Hillary's voting record.  Instantly we are reminded of John Kerry. Funny how that works.  We know why, it's a simple formula.  When your goal is to be electable rather than responsible, you tend to have trouble keeping on a path that anyone might call dedicated.  You tend to weave around trying to find that perfect path that appeals to as many potential voters as you can. That, sadly is politics today, and when your political party of declaration is on the skids, you have to find some way to look a little like the other party, right?

Thus we have Hillary's voting record that looks like a meandering river headed to sea.  First she's for it, then she's against it.  Like Diane Feinstein in Congress or Barbara Boxer, she also appears to be making a little money while in Congress.  How interesting that she finds the time to invest so well while so busy conducting the country's business that she misses a surprising number of votes while being a good little Senator.  Oh well, we guess that goes with the territory when you are an aspiring liberal Senator.  Oh god, we did use that L word.  Perhaps we are being unfair.  After all, a Yale trained politician with highly suspicious legal activities in the Whitewater debacle might simply be judged a scoundrel rather than a liberal.  After all, not every liberal is also a crook.  We apologize to those bleeding hearts who are otherwise honest and respectable despite their rather dubious attitudes on appeasement and confrontation in the real world.

So what would a second Clinton Presidency do for this nation?   Well, it is hard to say with any real predictability.  We do have some ideas however.  Like John Kerry, Mz. Clinton might be leaning toward taking decisive action against terrorists, if we could only figure out where they live?  Also she could be counted on making good friends with the French....since we all know the French are victims of Republican propaganda and that the oil-for-food scam is just political hay being tossed around by the Bush administration.

And of course the really important issues of North Korea and Iran would be solved by Mz. Clinton's heavy experience in dealing with misbehaving children like husband Bill.  She'd spank them, shake a finger at 'em and then shun them her bed for a decade or two. No, there is no doubt that we'll never see a nuclear weapon in those folks hands with Mz. Clinton in office. 

Tough, decisive and not at all vindictive, that's our Hillary.  Of course, while some of us might wish she were a little more proactive and even perhaps a tad more angry about her husband's indiscretions, we assume the liberal women's organizations will forget all that and jump on her campaign wagon, ignoring stronger and ten times as effective leaders such as Condy Rice.  Sigh.  We can only assume that Alma Powell will continue to keep her husband from becoming the next President of the United States.

Returning to Mz. Clinton.  What does she bring to the office.  Well there was that remarkable attempt at socializing U.S. medicine.  And of course she did sort of vote and then not vote for the War on Terror.  There is the wavering support for the U.S. troops and the best thing we can say so far is that she didn't do a Jane Fonda and travel to Iraq and support Saddam Hussein during Gulf War II. We assume her Yale education didn't stick when it came to standing up for her principles.

We did use the Liberal word earlier -- we did so for a reason.  The quote at the lead-in to this opinion piece makes it pretty clear.  So does a hilarious cartoon we found online in response to Hillary's coming out party in San Francisco.  We're looking, of course, for the next public statement that will flip-flop on that concept.  After all, all the analysts are now saying that Hillary is attempting to find that right path, that meandering walk into the White House that will have her move from Liberal Populist (see the chart at the bottom of the linked page) to a damn near Conservative Libertarian.

There are several things she will never be able to convince the public of.  At the top of the list is her stand on abortion. She is neither for it or against it, she just thinks that it is a woman's choice. 



Additional Reading:

  1. Biography of Hillary Rodham Clinton, The White House, undated
  2. The Psychobiography of Hillary Clinton, Paul Lowinger, undated
  3. Hillary Clinton For President in 2008, The Hillary Clinton Forum Online, undated
  4. God Bless Hillary Clinton, Tony Blankely, The Washington Times, 12/15/2004
  5. Hillary Rodham Clinton Quotes, Jone Johnson Lewis, Women's History Site "About", undated
  6. Hillary Clinton on Abortion, Issues 2000 online, undated, however quotes are dated and referenced
  7. Hillary Clinton on SenateMatch, Issues 2000 online, undated
  8. Hillary Clinton thanks England for looking after Chelsea, BBC Reviews, 4/7/2003
  9. Signature Quotes:  Politics - Hillary Clinton, Mark Urbin, undated
  10. The Truth Comes Out, Mark Urbin, the Eclipse Web Warren, 7/6/2004
  11. San Francisco Rolls Out The Red Carpet for the Clintons, Beth Fouhy , Associated Press, 6/28/2004
  12. Hillary Clinton's Record, Dr. Gerhard Falk, Jewish Buffalo on the Web, undated